Why I Should Have Gotten the Autism Diagnosis for My Child Early On (or Why I Did Not)

For 16 years, my child displayed numerous symptoms that left us searching for answers, but a genetic diagnosis remained elusive.  I considered having my child evaluated for autism to shed light on their situation.  However, when I reached out to teachers, doctors, and therapists, I received frustrating responses:

1. “Your child is too friendly to be autistic.” This statement made me doubt the possibility of autism because my child was sociable.
2. “Your child can transition from one activity to another – they are not autistic.” Hearing this, I questioned whether my child’s ability to shift activities invalidated the need for an autism evaluation.
3. “Your child can look me in the eye and answer questions – they are not autistic.” Observations like this made me second-guess the idea of autism, even though my child faced various challenges.
4. “Getting a diagnosis that does not apply to your child would be a big waste of money.” Despite my persistent concerns, this cautionary advice about the evaluation costs left me hesitant.

We finally pursued an evaluation when my son turned 20, and it confirmed that he is indeed on the autism spectrum (severe side).  Looking back, I regret not taking this step sooner.  I should have pursued the autism diagnosis before we received the genetic diagnosis.  There are several benefits we could have gained as a family if we had pursued an early diagnosis:

1. “Early Support Is Crucial:” I now realize that early intervention could profoundly impact my child’s development.  We could have accessed the right services and therapies much earlier with a diagnosis.
2. “Understanding My Child Better:” I struggled to comprehend my child’s behaviors and communication difficulties.  An earlier diagnosis could have provided insights into their unique needs and thought processes.  The education could also help me explain how to react to my child’s behavior to family members.
3. “Tailored Guidance and Resources:” A diagnosis could have opened doors to specialized resources and guidance, enabling me to provide the best possible support for my child.
4. “Connecting with Others:” Being part of the autism community might have connected us with other parents who understand our experiences.  Sharing and learning from each other could have been invaluable.
5. “Planning for the Future:” Knowing more about my child’s strengths and challenges could have helped me better plan their future, including education, career, and overall well-being.

Ultimately, I know this decision is significant, requiring careful consideration by parents.  Looking back, I wish I had trusted my instincts and sought an evaluation sooner to improve my child’s life.